So I've got this friend named Dave. He's a pretty quiet guy, he doesn't really go out that much. He's got a couple hobbies, nothing unusual. He reads a lot. He maintains a pretty steady routine. Everyday he does the same thing, and one day he was doing just that, eating his Muesli, reading his newspaper, and he turned to the back page and saw an ad for the circus. He thought to himself "You know, I should get out more, I need to start doing things."
So he went, and he sat in the back, because as an adult male being alone at the circus is pretty weird. But he was having a good time. The tightrope walkers were walking, the lion tamer was lion taming, the motorcycle was going around that big thing motorcycles go around in. And this clown came out, with a giant black hat. He set it down, and reached his hand in and pulled out a kangaroo. And he said "Whaaaaat's this kids?" and the kids are going apeshit and go "IT'S A KANGAROO!" And the clown pulled out a rabbit and said "Whaaaaat's this kids?" and the kids are screaming "IT'S A RABBIT!" And the clown pulled out a donkey, and said "Whaaaaaat's this kids?" and Dave goes "It's an ass!" and the clown said "YOUUUU'RE AN ASS!" and everyone started laughing at Dave and Dave was really, really embarrassed.
When he got home that night, he was sulking around and thought to himself "You know what? Fuck that. I need to get control of my life. I can never let anything like that ever happen again." So the next day he went to the library and started reading about comedians. He rented the classics: Mel Brooks, Charlie Chaplin, Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis, Woody Allen . He studied them, he learned. He joined an improv class, and after many months found himself one of the most popular people there, due to his growing wit. He started doing stand up, made a lot of friends. He went out at night. He laughed. But he was still the same old Dave. And one day he was reading his newspaper, eating his Muesli, and he turned to the back page and saw the same ad for the same circus. And so he decided to go.
So he goes, of course, and sits in the back because he's embarrassed, but he's enjoying himself. The trapeze artists are trapeezing, , the elephants were walkin' around in a circle holdin' each other's tails and shit, the ringmaster was mastering. And then the same clown came out with the same black hat, and put it on the table. And the clown pulled out a kangaroo. And he said "Whaaaaat's this kids?" and the kids are going apeshit and go "IT'S A KANGAROO!" And the clown pulled out a rabbit and said "Whaaaaat's this kids?" and the kids are screaming "IT'S A RABBIT!"
And the clown pulled out a donkey, and said "Whaaaaaat's this kids?"
and Dave goes "It's an ass!"
and the clown said "YOUUUU'RE AN ASS!"
And Dave said "FUCK YOU CLOWN"
Monday, November 1, 2010
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